You've Been Bad this Year...!

Ah, the holidays. I think about sex toys for gifts. Kink. Atmosphere. Anal. Oral. New things, old things. Pretty clothes to have him rip off.

I really just want him bad.

Working Takes the Mind off Certain Things

I have been working every single day since getting over strep throat. I am SO horny. And I haven't had time to sit down and jack off. Oh, life! Woe is me!

But I did send Ninja a couple pics to keep him occupied while he is away at his home town. I wore a fun little sexy underthing I've had sitting in my drawer for months. He asked for a couple more, so I guess he liked it well enough.

And I'm off to work, then a friend's place for Christmas, then flying home for a week... I'll update in between, I swear.

Don't Lick my Spoons!

I have strep throat. I got a shot in the ass, and within a week's time I should be fine. In the mean time, I am supposed to get through my review boards for college. This will be fun.

What's worse? Ninja leaves for his home town on Wednesday! I need to be better so we can have one last hurrah before he's gone 'til January 5th or some ridiculous date... He came over and we watched a movie with Marlon Brando, and he'd kiss my neck instead, and look at me smirking with his shirt pulled over his mouth and nose to fend off "the germs." Pssshhhhh... Can't even stay the night with me.

It's not the end of the world, having gone months at a time and so on. But, damn it. I want those days over! Sex, 5 times a day, 'til the day I die! Please?

Random Thoughts

I did my laundry today. I wish Ninja would come over and make my sheets smell like sex again. I miss him. I miss sex. I miss having time to do things and go out and take naps curled up in each other's arms. Am I a romantic? The point is, I'm having trouble getting even the bare-minimum of my homework done, but I'd drop an evening for him in a heartbeat.

I'm an online watcher of Grey's Anatomy, and it really freaks me out that Izzy can have sex with her dead fiancé. In a recent episode she told Christina that she was having the best sex ever. Whaaat? It doesn't sound too appealing if it's all in your head. I mean, masturbating is fun and all (what do you think I was doing at 4am this morning?) but... I'll pass on ghost sex.

He Didn't Come

I nudged him from the side of my bed, woke him up, asked if he wanted a shower. He mumbled yes. He looked so darn cute with his arms all tangled around his head that I snuggled up to him.

"You want a quicky?" he asked while I stared creepily at him, inches away.

YES.

Thirty minutes later I was giving him head and realized I had fifteen minutes to shower and get out the door for work. He apologized for the quicky turning into a longer session -- on the contrary, my dear, the more the merrier! I, however, apologized for him not having an orgasm...

We've shredded my mattress cover with all the sex I've had the past few days. That session that morning basically put it in ruin -- we'd switched positions, me on top, him on top, fast, slow, to oral. It was great. But.

In all the lovemaking we've had, he has never, ever, ever not come.

I know it's entirely not something to be caught up on, but I don't like that at all.

A Bump in the Night

There are many pleasures to sharing a bed with your lover. I love that sometimes I'll wake in the night and adjust myself, and Ninja will accomodate me and wrap his arms around me, hold me, snug up against me. I like to watch his face, and notice the light on his body, and how the blankets wrinkle around him. I enjoy feeling the hollows and bulges of our bodies and where our skin meets and separates.

Sometime during the night I was laying on my side and I felt his hand on my hip. He was pushing himself against me, and my body was already reacting. Tremors, trembling, heat. I don't know why, but being woken up for sex is one of my favourite things. Like, favourite favourite.

He rolled on top of me and did me good as I layed on my belly, 'til he whispered if I wanted to be on top. Ugh, forcing me to regain my body so as to reposition myself -- but, of course! We rolled over and some fun hip action brought his orgasm.

That was fun. There was something that I felt which I hadn't felt in a while. Just an extra inch of passion, I suppose it might have been.

That hickey he gave me is finally almost gone. It's an interesting souvenir, a mark of ownership and a memoir of togetherness.

Have a good Thanksgiving, y'all. Ninja will be coming over - snickered that we could have sex on the countertops because all of my roommates are gone. Of course that would be a bad idea (we have a mouse army) but there's that little part of me that would do just about everything, anywhere, any time.

But, really, I'm just a normal shy girl.

Waiting for Boyfriend

Ninja will be coming over soon. I haven't seen him substantially in over a week, and nearly two since the last time I saw him naked. Absurd? Yes.

During a class break and before a meeting I had with my professor I snuck into the bathroom with the intent of relieving some really freaking intense sexual frustrations. Alas, there were people around and I weirded myself out. I suffered through it, and left as a normal person would, and eventually I quieted down. Good thing, it turns out.

Real relief! It comes! Movie and snuggles.

Tapping on my Shoulder, Jerk

Today I have run into so many sexual references I could pull my hair out. Even down to looking at the hot chocolate package I had to describe (don't ask) to read that the Aztecs claimed it to be an aphorodisiac. One of my groupmates remarked about something being kinky, and then the other started listing synonyms. I, of course, kept my cover and remained attuned to the assignment.

It's not even that my body wants it - my brain wants it. Maybe one of these days I'll get to exploring this interesting, infuriating separation. I haven't successfully masturbated in going on three days. I think I'll try again tonight. Like, I have to put effort into it. Which sucks, but hey, I'll deal.

Of course, there is so much more to this than just observing the fact that my sex drive is not compatable with reality. Regardless, a lack of time/attention does not kill, believe it or not. Say, let us make the best of things and get in some playtime.

Something to be Said for Resourcefulness

I just heard Brat Roommate recounting to Messy roommate some unpleasant scenarios during sex. The good ol' condom up the vag, lost tampon... and sticking a make-up sponge up there to have period sex?

WHAT?! I knew she wasn't the brightest crayon, but damn. That's a bad idea. There are real alternatives, such as the Instead Soft Cup. Or just sucking it up and risking "a massacre" as someone I once knew said.

I don't even use pads or tampons because, on top of saving loads of money, I don't like the thought of fiber-y, bleached material sticking to my wet bits. I can't imagine using something that disgusting.

I learn new things about this girl every day!

Freudian Slip

So Ninja has the frame of mind of "better out than in" and keeps a bottle around to spit in. Not always so elegant, but, whatever. He's a man of his own breed. This morning we were sitting at his computer and he did his business. I noticed he'd stuffed an apple core inside it. Okay, so he can't be bothered to use a proper trash bin, either, oookay.

My mind wandered around to science and spontaneous creation.

"I wonder what kind of orgasms are growing in that thing," I wondered aloud.

He snickered. "Freudian slip! You said orgasms! Hahahaha!"

I couldn't even say anything in return.

Blowjob Tip

A few days ago I was over at Ninja's place. We had an evening much like the days of old, where I watched him play video games and browse the computer. I get stupidly satisfied watching him.

Also, since it makes me a burden to society, I'm finally getting to watch The Matrix Trilogy.

I spent the night, naturally. Yay! Favourite things! We took a shower in the morning, and there was shower sex in the cramped little cubicle. Something about it is strangely erotic, when my wet hair is plastered to my face and the wall.

I was on my knees for a blowjob (never completed one in that position) and things weren't going so well. No slippery, slick surface. Water was washing away my spit, so it was a lot more work. Instead, it all piled in my mouth and made me want to gag. Damn it. A few minutes of that and we switched positions, eventually splitting from the shower to his bed.

I still haven't given him a proper blowjob, and it's starting to get me down. I want his cum in my mouth. Simple, right? No, it's a delicate procedure... Well, I'll be on my period soon, and he doesn't leap at the thought of period sex, so maybe I'll get the chance to boost my morale then.

Pothead Roommate = Pornstar Roommate

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Woe is Me

I just got home from having strangers stick their fingers and cold metal things up my vag, AKA the OB/GYN for a PAP smear. The hospital I go to for it is connected with a local medical school, so they have students and interns watch or do procedures under supervision. They had to wiggle around the speculum a great many times because my insides are weird, but beyond that I just stared calmly up at the light, which had a boring picture of hot air balloons over it. The doctor said, "You are so calm, cool, and collected! Thank you so much!" It must have been those hypnotizing hot air balloons.

I'm really hoping to get some quality time with the man in my life. This weekend was a no-go, everything is a no-go, I'm sad and hopeful.

Too Good

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

This is What I Get for Having the Hottest Guy Around

I caught up with Ninja on AIM this morning.

He told me his new circle of friends thinks he's an asshole, because he was flirting with a chick who started trying to hook up with him. He informed her of, well, me and I guess that came as a bad surprise.

So, later, I asked if he wanted to hook up with me. Wink wink, nudge nudge.

He said he wanted to but couldn't. Too much work.

Don't marriages get like this? Hmf!

A Bad Spell

With midterms I've not been getting much attention. AKA haven't seen Ninja since last Sunday. I only went boxing once last week! Pitiful.

Masturbating has been pretty damn annoying, too. I lay down, assemble formation... and fall asleep or for some mental reason can't get into it.

It's always a bad sign when my drive gets that low. To be honest I can't really think of the last time this has happened. My body just doesn't respond, and I'm lazy.

But I still really want to cum.

It's time for some porn.

Yeah, it's useful when I need it, or want it. Finding good stuff is kind of difficult, though. I only go to free clip sites, and the only time I've ever had porn on my computer was when I was browsing network folders at home and found myself trapped in a huuuuge folder of... all sorts of things. Why they were on the network, I have no idea. Nor do I want to know if it was my brother's stash, father's stash.. or worse.. their stash.

Ew.

Elusive Orgasms

We were crunched between my wall and spooning when he started playing with my clit. Ooh. "You close? You gonna cum all over my cock?"

Those naughty words, they drive me crazy. The thing is... I'd never done it.

WHAT?!

Confused? That's right, I am one of the most knowledgable about the fact that sex isn't all about orgasms. Sure, I masturbate to high heaven. But I haven't ever cum from sex. Not oral, not PIV, nothin'. Up until last Sunday, I'd only masturbated in the presence of Ninja once before (though he's the owner of a couple videos from when we were a LDR).

It seems odd. It even strikes me as odd. We've been together well over a year and a half and he'd only once seen my O-face. Almost appalling, right?

But no, it's not. It doesn't bother me. He makes me feel the most amazing things and tries, tries, tries--it just doesn't happen. And that's totally okay, because I still can't keep from moaning.

But this time, after his hand got tired, he placed mine there. What, he was serious?

Well, it's not like I don't want to cum. So I started rubbing.. and god damn did it take forever! I can sometimes get myself off in under two minutes (the so-called "two minute method") but part of the "problem" with sex is that it feels so different. It gets me swollen and wet like crazy, and when I play with myself I just don't get that way. So it took probably upwards of a half an hour.

During that time we adjusted our position, and I got anxious and embarassed that it was taking forever and he would fall asleep on me (three orgasms would do that to me, too) but he assured me to do it, do it, do it. So I got comfortable...

It ebbed and flowed.. closer.. farther away... a distraction and I'd set myself back a couple rounds. But eventually I felt the tightening, tingling of pre-orgasm and Ninja snapped to attention and put himself inside me again. Oh, that felt extra-good.

And then I came and it was good and I felt amazing and then he started in and out and it felt SO GOOD. I had a passing thought about my roommates, if any were home I pitied them.

So, hey. I got three hours of loving, and had an orgasm. And he gave me a hickey, too. Right on my neck. It's faded by now... no one said anything... thank god. What am I, 12?

Unfortunately, though, we're going on another week without attention. Here's hoping this cycle breaks.

With Roommates Around

Mmm, morning autosex for fourty-five-plus minutes. My stamina is admirable.

I woke up early this morning, 8am. I did the morning duties in my robe, and decided I didn't yet want to start on the ominous essay I have looming over my head. Prior to falling asleep last night (with some sexy music playing) I started to play with myself... only to, you know, fall asleep. As such, I had unfinished business to do.

Back to bed I went, and thus commenced the foreplay. It was going pretty damn good with a nice fantasy unwinding when I heard something other than the footsteps of the elephants upstairs. A certain rhythmic bed rocking. Brat Roommate already was fucking her new man? I haven't even met the guy yet; they went out on a date last weekend I think.

But really, all this meant was that I was bothered by the fact that they were fucking while I was simply trying to do the same in the other dimension (the dimension that bans all homework and adult duties other than sexing). Listening to my roommates fuck is not a turn on, mostly because Brat Roommate in particular sounds like a goat in the process of getting strangled. I toned down my handy work and maintained my arousal by stuffing my head in my pillow and seeing hot things in my mind until I heard the last of the goat bleeting and bed rocking. Please, please let it be over soon...

My fingers started strumming again when... damn it, they're going for round two. Rinse, repeat.

At least we're in separate rooms, now. Brat Roommate and I used to share a room in the residence last year, and I slept with my iPod every evening she spent with a guy to try to block out their incessant goat-fucking. That didn't stop her then-boyfriend from drunkenly, mistakenly, nakedly trying to get into my bed one night, but it helped me last the year.

There Are Other Things

After spending my day with my friend London, Ninja brought over some fish for me to pop in the oven and we had a fairly long-awaited night together. It was off to a late start, so the movie part of the date was out. That just means we'll have to go out some time this week, though, right?

"I hope you don't mind that I'm going to fuck your brains out all night," he said in his suave tone. He just uses the right words, doesn't he? Don't even get me started by his oh-so-strategic use of the term "pee-pee." By the way; no, I don't mind at all.

The night progressed and he had a headache and got grouchy. He grabbed my tit and sketched it out for homework... but that was all the de-braining I got of the evening. He apologized, and of course it was okay. I do keep him around for more than one reason, don't you know!

Didn't mean I didn't try to tempt him by trailing my hanging breasts across his chest as I snaked across his body to lay beside him. But he was true to his word, and I helped him finish his homework and was sedated by the feeling of his body under my covers. I got snuggles, kisses, and happiness. It was a sweet, comfortable night.

There's I O U waiting for me though...!

Lets Break the Bed

Classes make me want to hang myself, and everyone else has been having a rough go of things as well. I even went a few days without playing with myself. I'd get into bed, get all cozied up, spread my legs... and fall asleep.

But that didn't last too long.

Relationship-wise, things have become erratic. I spent the night with Ninja a week ago, and we've gone boxing once or twice. (You have no idea how much I just want to push him in someone's dark driveway and fuck him. It would be a great warm-up, right?) Contact is at a minimum but it is becoming less frustrating; the only thing I can do is care less. That sounds harsher than it is.

It's not all shades of gray, though. Tuesday was pretty fun. I was merrily typing away at an application when Ninja IMed asking if I'd like to take a break. Well, duh. So I typed faster and we had about an hour to enjoy each other's company before I had to be at work.

Quickies are fun and awesome, but I really am starting to miss the longer sessions. I miss giving him three orgasms, I miss trying to get to my own. I don't like to because it will take forever, and we just don't have forever anymore.

Not that I'm ungrateful for his genius idea, however... nor am I ungrateful for the fact that I said "no, no, no!" but he still went "yes, yes, yes!" and took me from behind, standing.

Today I was zombified, sitting in my robe doing homework, when the doorbell rang. It was Ninja! Life came back to me. He came in to surprise me, shivering, begging me to curl up in bed. I was pissed about some rude business at his hand the night prior, but I certainly couldn't let the boy remain cold.

So, as it goes, I was riding him on top, tits bouncing in his face, hands on my headboard, when I noticed the squeaking of my bed. I paused and said, "There is something I want to do before I die."

"What's that?"

"I want to break a bed," I replied. He laughed and said he was thinking the very same thing, "Lets break this bed!" Well, no, this is my ancient bed, and I need it.

So it's been arranged that the last day before he moves out of the dorms, we're going to try to break his bed. I don't really know how we'd do that, but it'll be fun trying. We'd better not forget about this. I want to experience bed-breaking sex.

There's no telling when I'll get my lovin's next. I hate that... but I did like the surprise today. I've got my fingers crossed.

----------

Oh yeah, where you at? (Credit)

My Sex Life when I'm NOT in a Long-Distance Relationship... Revisited

So that delightful combination of morning sex, shower sex, and post-shower sex is a thing of the past.

Cuddling afterwards is also minimal, because I'm usually the one that has to jump up immediately to get ready for work or school.

I've had sex... twice? Three times in the last week? I've seen Ninja that many times.

It sucks a lot.

So, amended, this is my sex life when I finally have my boyfriend within arm's reach, but other shit gets in the way. My pussy is raging, but instead I have to read about Japanese history, or go to work, or any number of completely nonsexy things.

We had a bit of a talk about this, Ninja and I. See, we used to be together all the time. Almost daily. I had work, Ninja didn't have a job much of the time. So I'd go see him every night, and we'd hang out during the weekends, and so on. We had all the free time in the world, and whenever his roommate was gone we'd be at it in the bed and I got to slowly explore my desires.

But life's not like that, now. We're both in school full-time, and work any number of days per week, and it's only proper to have friends on the side in addition to homework time. It's a lucky thing we box together, but he's hardly been going to that.

It's embarassing that... I guess he's more mature to acknowledge that, whereas I envisioned nights out on the town, sharing a bed, showering together, and calling to see how the other was when we were apart for days at a time.

It's funny: even though he's finally close to me, finally here... I miss him more than when we were hundreds of miles apart. I guess it is silly.

That's the price of growing up and trying to ensure a future, though, right? Sacrifices. We need to get through this before travelling the world and being amazing artists. Or whatever will happen.

But, hell! Masturbating doesn't cut it in the slightest. I've even started to give up on it.

But I'm horny, and it's my only option, so I'm going to go play with myself.

Relief Comes Slowly

Being full-time in college and overwhelmed with work and social predicaments sucks ass. As does trying to keep breathing room between us, lest we (Ninja and myself) get too absorbed in each other (again) and block out other important things.

But, you know, that's just the way it is now.

A few nights ago Ninja came over to spend the night with me. It was a somewhat random event; he called at 11pm saying he was coming over. I'd already gone to bed, growly and dressed extravagantly in my blue, fuzzy robe. As such, we squished into my single-person bed and snuggled.

And he kissed me goodnight, but I did not stop kissing him. His hand was on my hip, and he grabbed me hard, and that roused me immediately. Making out and slithering together like snakes, so hot.

Being on the rag, I had my menstrual cup in. But don't let the label fool you; it is physically possible to have sex with it inserted and not make a mess. Just takes a bit of practice. And funny positioning.

We were a bit sloppy this time around, though... my fault. You see, in the midst of the deed, I got reminded of the overwhelming desire to blow him. So I hopped off (I'm sure he had a confused look on his face, I could certainly hear it in his voice when he asked me what I was doing) and grabbed his cock and started doing what I wanted to do.

Something about tasting myself on him, it pleases me. Mmm.

I didn't get to the finish line, though... he brought me up from the depths saying I was doing a good job but that he wasn't going to come. Damn it. It had only been a couple minutes anyway! Guess he was in a hurry.

So I admit I was pissed, but not for too long. We went back to spooning and by default my mind was swiftly blanked and, well, you know how things end. With sweating and snuggling and smiling.

At least my vag can do a better job than my mouth.

On Call

So I don't have much to update about, or rather I don't have the mindset to organize it all into an entry.

Ninja has been rare to even pick up his phone, let alone soothe my sexual frustrations.

I'm in masturbation overdrive, but sadly it's not helping all too much.

Surprise!

Funny; after I wrote that entry we had a dry spell of like, two days. Two days too many. I played with myself way too much to try to make up for it, but to be honest, it threw me for a bit of a loop. And I've been really sore because I seriously masturbated too much. I could barely walk Friday.

Now I'm relaxing in my apartment, while Ninja is off in his dormatory. He was over earlier, watching football. I made us lunch (salmon and lobster pinwheels) and did some nasty homework and sat with him the remainder of the game between New England and Kansas City. He was sprawled on the couch, and I got to sit comfortably between his legs. He pulled down my spaghetti-strap top and held my breast, comfortable as could be.

Deep down of course I enjoy it, but Brat Roommate was around. By a blessed coincidence, however, she was in her room. Every movement made me jumpy, though... I keep my image relatively clean; it's Ninja who is sabotaging it by inserting our secret details in normal daily conversation with strangers. Sigh. That's why this is an anonymous blog, thank you very much.

"I'm gonna put my penis in you [after the game]," he said while squeezing my breast and playing with my nipple piercing. Yay! Twenty-four hours too long since the last time my vagina saw him. 4 minutes left. I rubbed his cock through his jeans.

A commercial break. Making out is fun. We don't do it all that often, but, you know, maybe we should. I love kissing, and the way bodies move. It's hot. He noticed. I ccouldn't help it. 2 minutes left.

Then! We're off to the bedroom, the TV is cut, he shut the door, I sent an avalanche of clothes and blankets off my bed, and after reaching that blissful state of mutual nakedness, he threw me down on top of it. Good lord. He kissed me.

He moved down my body, touching my stomach, his arms at my legs, where is he going? Come back and kiss me! Oh. Oh. Oh. He spread my thighs and I experienced the most gorgeous thing. I looked between my tits and there he was: arms wrapped around my legs, his skin pale in the daylight (I had to be reminded to close the curtains!), and his head lowering... oh yes.

I don't know the last time he gave me that glorious gift that is oral sex. But for a few sweet minutes I got to feel the warmth and wetness of his tongue. Squeeze his head and feel his scalp with my fingers. And look down to see that image that in itself turns me on. Damn, I say. Turns me on.

Oh wait, be quiet, don't let Brat Roommate hear!

Suddenly, up he went, my legs lifted, and POW the paralyzing pleasure of cock and pussy. He pounded away, my eyes rolled in the back of my head, until he came and rested on top of me, smirking that he just lost four pounds of water weight.

We separated, dressed, and I remembered feeling pain when that POW came... well, fuck, I was bleeding. And I rolled around on my bed for a good couple of minutes in further excruciating pain. I personally like it when my cervix gets hit during intercourse. But sometimes, rarely, I'll get huge, horrible, terrible, cramp-like pain. Pain in the ass, I say. A few minutes and I manned up, and all was well.

No pain, no gain. Bring it on, boy.

My Sex Life when I'm NOT in a Long-Distance Relationship

...is pretty freakin' awesome.

I know, I know, it's been a while since I've updated. Ninja arrived at my apartment at 5am on Wednesday morning, tired and cranky from a 15 hour drive. He warned me that there would be no sex that night. I'm a reasonable gal, I totally understood that. I was pretty tired myself.

But I am/he is just that awesome that despite his grouchy warnings, after we piled all his stuff out of the rental car, shoved it in my room, and got into bed to fall asleep, he took me sweetly from behind. And I still had my cup in (he doesn't like bloody messes).

He made an exception to the rule a few more times before I had to go pick up my friend from the airport. Yes, duh, I was late because we had sex. For, like, the fourth time.

And then after a few days of sneaking in lovings when my friend was busy, I had to fly away to visit my family (yay for turning 21 and not having alcohol in any shape or form!).

But I got back last Saturday.

So it's pretty awesome having my favourite man at my side. In addition to all the fun non-sexy things we can do (he's a football fanatic... is it strange that the word "draft" now doesn't pop into my head as the draft of this entry, but a football draft?"), at any point in time either of us can satisfy our lusty needs.

There are few better mornings than a morning that consists of morning sex, shower sex, and post-shower sex.

Today we went from his dorm to my apartment after some lunch. We ate, we chilled, we snuggled on my bed. I layed on top of him and did a little grinding jokingly, and he told me to take off his pants and ride him. I got up and did some things while laughing to myself that it would be crazy to do such a thing... and then realized that it was a genius idea. Off went his pants and in went his cock.

He's got tricks up his sleeve; he wrangled me into a new position with me on top like reverse cowgirl only I leaned back with my hands on his shoulders and held myself up. Awkward to get a hang of, but it was a success. I just need more strength in my legs, the wimpy girl I have become.

It wore him out so he took a nap, and I joined him soon thereafter. So as to not be late for work I set my phone alarm 15 minutes prior to when I had to leave. Ring, ring, ring and I roused myself. Ninja got up and told me to take off my pants, and he went and locked my bedroom door. Oooohhhh yes, this is happening and I like it.

"Just lay there," he said as I rolled over on my stomach. Yes, I can do that. And I did lay there when he bent over me and breathed in my ear, making my knuckles turn white from gripping my bedposts so tightly. Oooohhh yes.

So I'm going to have a really tough time adjusting to having sex whenever the mood hits. Yeah, right. You can expect some consistency with my posting from now on, too. FYI.

And, no, I wasn't late for work today.

Head First

Ah, finally!

I've decided to just dive in head-first with this thing. I think what I've accomplished sexually deserves attention, so I'm not going to vomit some summary. The past doesn't matter right now. I'll talk about it as time goes on in all its glory.

What matters right now is the fact that in twenty-four hours I will be having sex.

My boyfriend/fiancé AKA Ninja is moving from my home state to here, the New England area, tomorrow. It's been almost a full year of being 800 miles apart, during which I have realized that I really, really.. um... enjoy his company.

So by the time I get out of work, he'll be in town. We'll unpack his things immediately (or not) and return the rental car immediately (or not), or we'll make enough room for me to squeeze in and we'll drive somewhere and have some car sex immediately (fingers crossed!). Or maybe we'll just lock my door and get to it.

I really don't care. For some ungodly reason I decided to hold off on masturbating 'til he got here. It's been over a week and a half. I am going insane, and I can't wait to have my hands on him. And his hands on me.

The anticipation is always killer, and in reality I saw him just two months ago. But masturbating is such a common activity for me that it's become almost necessary. I need my release. And because my release will be his release, I just crave it all the more.

I can't wait for tomorrow. I'm soft and smooth, freshly waxed. Slippery, mmm.

And so I begin this blog as a new page in my life is turned, with just one more longing, lustful nights of sleeping alone, when Tuesday will grant me the ability to give and get all the sex and loving I want and need. It's been hard, but it is so worth it. Ninja is amazing.

--- edit ---
Oh, hey, rental cars don't really do last-minute business. So he'll be here Wednesday morning. I hope I'll make it that long.